Archive Page 2

My Summer Vacation, Part 1

The day the boys flew out of Chicago towards Alaska, my sister had planned a night out for my birthday, which was a few days later.  So, once their plane had taken off, The Nerd and I drove to my aunt’s condo on Michigan Ave., had lunch with her, and picked up some things she’d told me she wanted the boys and me to have.  Since we had left town at 5 am, by the time we got back home I pretty much passed out for a couple of hours.  My sister came over when I got up and did my hair and make-up for me.  We were ready to go out!

Now, since we are proper grown ups (and mostly because sis is pregnant), we decided to forego the clubbing and have a big dinner with some family and friends at one of my favorite restaurants, a small, family run Italian joint in the basement of an old building.  Almost all of my buddies that I’d invited from school showed up, as well as my parents and my sister’s in-laws, who may as well be mine, too.  Even little Senor Fussypants was there!

He had fun being ooh-ed and aaah-ed over by everyone, including people at other tables. 

After dinner, we walked across the parking lot to the Mexican place to have margaritas.  We weren’t ready to go home, but I promised sis that I wouldn’t leave her out and we’d go somewhere smoke-free.  Plus, flan!  Of course, The Nerd was there and he kept the booze a-flowin’.  Sis and I giggled a lot that night.  I was very happy that my school buddies came, even The Superhero.

It was a great birthday.

A few days later, The Nerd and I set off for the first of our road trips.  This one was to Lexington, KY, for a 4th of July party at his aunt’s house.  Now, I’d met his parents, but his brother, sis-in-law, nephews, aunts, uncles, and cousins would be there, so I was a little nervous.  His aunt’s house was friggen fabulous – right on the golf course, brand spanking new, and wonderfully furnished.  Everyone was very nice, especially one of his uncles, who noticed I was pretty quiet and ended up talking to me about cars.  Turned out he had just bought a ’65 Corvette coupe at auction (Corvettes are my favorite cars, especially ones from the ’50’s and ’60’s).  I even got to play a bit with his youngest nephew, who’s only a few months older than Senor Fussypants.  We ended up staying the night at his brother’s house in southern Indiana AND I found Blue Bell ice cream in the nearby Wally World!  BLUE BELL!  For those of you who’ve lived in the south, you know what this means.  After all these months of me telling The Nerd how wonderful it is, he finally got to see for himself.

Two days after we got back from this trip, I was on my way to Houston…but that’s going to have to be a post in and of itself.

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Totally Music Tuesday

Not really music, but funny as hell.

Sideswiped

I was going to post about the things I did while the boys were away, but I got totally sideswiped today.  This afternoon, after taking Big J to the high school to talk to the athletic director about football, he was supposed to be getting ready for the afternoon’s practice.  Little J came in and asked me to come upstairs for a minute.

When I got up there, Big J told me he wanted to go and live with his dad.  When I asked him where this was coming from, he told me that one of his friends on Facebook told him that he was old enough to decide who he lives with, and that he’d talked to his dad and his grandmother about it already.  When I asked him what his reasons were for wanting this, he said that his dad was moving to either Texas or Hawaii next, and he’d have better sports opportunities, and  his dad would push him in sports more.  He also said that since his dad is going to be deployed again next year, his step-mom is going to need help with the baby.

I saw red.

Did I mention we had to leave in fifteen minutes?  He had to be at practice, I had to drop Little J off at The Nerd’s house, and I had a three-hour professional development meeting on campus.  I said a few things, not losing my temper, but I was visibly upset.  Big J told me that his dad had, “explained everything about the divorce” and admitted that he had been seeing someone else, so he thinks he knows the whole story.  We didn’t have time to really talk about it before he went to practice (which lasted till 9 tonight).

At around 7:30, my mom called me and the first thing she said was, “Stay calm.  Stay very, very calm.”  Then, she told me that Douche had called the house and left ONE message for Big J to call him.  She said a little while later, a police officer came to the door and said that Douche had called them wanting to know where his children were.  WHAT THE FUCK?  She explained to the cop, and then my step-dad called Douche…who, by the way, hadn’t called anyone’s cell phone besides Big J…and told him that he was at football practice and Big J was with me, and that we hadn’t been home all day.  He told my step-dad that Big J had sent him a text saying, “I’m scared” (I’m guessing right before he told me he wanted to move), and then never answered his texts or phone calls afterward (because he was at practice).  So, of course, the first response is to call the police!

I am beyond hurt and angry right now, and completely confused.  I talked to a friend who has a lot of experience with family court and custody issues in the state where we divorced, and it doesn’t seem like Douche has a leg to stand on to take either child away, as I have sole custody. 

Honestly, why would a parent do this?

Skipping July

So, I guess I pretty much disappeared for a month, eh?  Sorry ’bout that.  It isn’t that I didn’t want to tell you about everything that happened in the past 32 or so days, or that I didn’t miss reading about your days, nights, joys, disappointments, and all things in between, because I did.  I simply didn’t have the time to devote to keeping up.  I didn’t want to read one blog and not the others, and so much has happened in the past five weeks that every time I thought about writing a post, it seemed completely overwhelming, so I didn’t even try.

In the last month, I’ve:

*Been completely kid-free, except for late-night phone calls, e-mails, and texts.

*Been to Kentucky, Texas, Ohio, Missouri, and Illinois (some places more than once!)

*Helped with new student orientation on campus & done training for my new mentorship.

*Not spent one night in my own bed (until last night).

*Read three mystery noir novels by Megan Abbott and started another.

*Had a ton of fun throughout!

My boys just got home from Alaska last night, so things’ll be getting back to normal around here again soon.  I am not going to tell you I didn’t enjoy being able to make last minute plans or run interference between them and my mother, but I missed them like crazy and I’m overjoyed that they’re home.

As for my dad, the day I left Texas, he started feeling terrible.  He went to the doctor the next day and they admitted him back to the hospital for a blood infection.  😦  He was in the hospital about a week, and seems to be getting better again, but says he still feels “out of it.”  I was glad I got to spend some time with him, I worry about him a lot.

More soon, I promise!

Totally Music Tuesday

Wow, I am so out of the blogging thing this summer.  However, today is my birthday, the big 3-0.  The boys are safe and having fun, and so am I.  We had a celebration on Saturday, and I’ll get some pictures posted as soon as I get them from my sister.  My friends and The Nerd have made this the best birthday I can remember, and I am so lucky to have them.  Hope you’re having a great Tuesday, too!

Anxious Mama

My boys leave for Alaska in t-minus 16 hours and counting, and their mother is a nervous wreck.  They’re flying alone, from Chicago to Anchorage, which is an 7-hour flight.  Did I mention ALONE?  I was dealing with it pretty well until a couple of days ago when I realized this was really, actually going to happen, and then BAM, just like that, anxiety.

Last night was especially rough, with Little J getting upset because he’s worried his dad will think he’s “bad” or “irresponsible” because he doesn’t really know him anymore.  He did tell me he isn’t worried about the plane ride, though, because his big brother is going to be with him.  Neither of us slept much last night, and I am definitely taking Tylenol PM as we have to leave the house by 6 am to get to the airport in time.  Big J just seems really excited about it all.  Douche’s parents are going to be there, too, at least for part of their visit, and they’re finally getting to meet their almost 2-year-old half sister.

No matter how nuts they make me, no matter how much they argue and gripe with each other, I’m going to miss those boys something fierce.  Luckily, The Nerd and I have tons of plans for the next month, so I won’t have time to get too sad over it (I hope).  We went to the playground yesterday afternoon with my sister and Senor Fussypants and got some good pictures that I can take with me to my dad and grandparents when I head to Texas.

Meeting the Parents

Last week, besides all the stuff with my dad, my boys were away at camp at the Purdue campus.  The Nerd and I had dropped them off on Sunday afternoon, and I’d spent the week at his house, giving me and my mother a huge break from all the togetherness of home.  On Wednesday, we’d planned to paint his bedroom, babysit Senor Fussypants for a bit, and then head down to Illinois for the night.  We spent the morning covering and moving furniture, priming, and putting the first coat on the walls before taking a break when the baby arrived. 

Oh, we had fun with that boy.  He’s just a-movin’ and a-shakin’, and we played peek-a-boo, and “I’m gonna get-cha!”  I also took him out to the backyard and we swung in the hammock for a while.  When he was eating his lunch, he kept pointing to the yellow wall and saying what sounded like “gold.”  Genius?  I’ll leave that up to you to decide!  😉  We had such a good time playing, and his mama actually left him there longer than planned.  When he got restless, we turned on the Netflix (gotta love instant) to some Elmo movie.  That kid couldn’t take his eyes off of that little monster.  Seriously, he sat there and watched almost the whole thing before falling asleep!  I think my kids are just a tad too old to have caught the Elmo craze.  With them it was Blue’s Clues, before they replaced Steve.

We were all packed, we’d finished the second coat of paint, and were just getting dinner before heading out when I got the call about my dad.  Since no one really knew what was going on, I went into “phone tree” mode, calling my aunt, younger sister, and mother.  I decided that we sould go ahead and go as planned, that if nothing else, I’d be a little closer if I needed to go down to Houston.  So, off we went, with me on the phone and/or texting the entire time.  We made it to Bloomington, Il, at around midnight, completely exhausted as we’d gotten up at 6 that morning.  We brushed our teeth and passed out.  I woke up a lot, though, checking my phone to see if anything else had happened, and we were up again bright and early at 6am.  For good reason, though.  We met The Dish and her husband for breakfast!  🙂  It was my first bloggie meet-up, and I don’t think it could’ve gone any better.  It was really nice to put faces to the words, and they were both really sweet.  Let me tell you, she’s just as sassy as you’d expect, and I loved it.  Of course, I was still trying to get over my cold and super worried about my dad, but I still had a good time.  Her husband even helped me feel better by sharing some of his nurse’s wisdom about my dad’s surgery.  We had a nice visit, hopefully next time we’ll be able to visit longer. 

After breakfast was over, we zipped on down to Greenville, Il, which is pretty much in the middle of nowhere, but just a little north of St. Louis.  I was so nervous about meeting The Nerd’s parents, but I didn’t need to be.  They were warm and welcoming, and I found plenty of things to talk with them about.  They’ve been super busy recently because his father unexpectedly lost his job due to cutbacks.  They’d planned on moving when he retired in a few years, but now everything’s been pushed up, so they decided to put their house on the market, just to see what happened.  The very next day, someone gave them an offer.  For the amount they wanted.  Can you say “holy hell, Batman!?”  So, when we showed up, they were in the middle of getting the house ready for inspection, his dad’s trying to find a job, and they have to find somewhere to live starting in…oh, about a month.  Yet, they seemed to enjoy having us there.  They took us down to St. Charles, which reminded me a bit of Natchitoches, Louisiana, with its little shops and bricked main street next to the river.  We had a nice afternoon walking around there (good lord, was it hot and humid), then had dinner before coming back.  It was good to be out doing things and not sitting around worrying about my dad.  We weren’t sure about the sleeping arrangements, as The Nerd hadn’t brought anyone home since before he was married.  He asked his mom, “So…did you want us to use one bedroom or two?”  She seemed really confused and said, “Well, both rooms are ready, so it’s up to you.”  We used one, and he said he didn’t get the “look of shame” the next morning, so yay!  We stayed another night before heading back to Purdue on Saturday to get the boys.

All in all, it was a good trip, despite all the worry over my dad.  We may be going back down to help them move after I get back from Texas next month, and I feel good about it.  And The Nerd?  He said his parents love me.  😀  And I didn’t take one picture, not a one.  Can you believe that?