It’s All Right to Cry, Crying Gets the Sad Out of You

It might make you feel better.  At least that’s what Rosey Grier told me when I watched Free to Be You and Me as a young’un.  That song has been going through my mind all day, along with a general feel of unease.  I don’t allow myself to cry very much anymore, because there are simply too many people around here who would ask questions.  Questions that I don’t know how to answer. 

I honestly don’t have too much to be sad about, just one really big thing that I can’t talk about here because I made a promise not to.  Note to self:  don’t ever promise that to anyone again.  This started out as the one place where I could write about anything and everything, good or bad, with no fear of anyone getting hurt or mad, but now I can’t write about what is really bothering me.  Damn, damn, double damn. 

I feel like everything is out of control and one of the relationships that made me happy before is a mess.  I know that doesn’t make much sense, and I’m sorry.  I’m hoping that at least writing cryptically about things will help me shake this uneasy feeling. 

I want to be excited about things again, excited about life, the future, about everything.  I know it will happen, I know.  It takes time.  If Honeywine had her way, it would also take a flurry of men.  That’s not me, though.  I’m sure there will be a man someday, but I can’t help but wonder if I’ll ever find what I thought I already had (does that make sense?).  Shit, I sound like a damn 50-year-old woman who’s been divorced three times.  Slap me, please?

I’m going to have lunch tomorrow with my girlfriends from my previous job, I’m sure that will do some good.  My Bekki can always make me laugh.  She’s my wonder twin.  I think I am also going to go and talk to one of the apartment complexes that has income guidelines.  I have a friend who lives there, and they are nice.  I’m not sure how low the rent would be, but I know I need to go and find out.  I need to do something before I lose my mind!

By the way, I’m totally procrastinating when I should be studying for my test tomorrow.

4 Responses to “It’s All Right to Cry, Crying Gets the Sad Out of You”

  1. 1 honeywine September 25, 2008 at 9:25 pm

    Well, if you insist! *smack* In all fairness, a flurry of men is my answer to most things. Man, I miss being single…sometimes. And, hey, you can’t say you didn’t have fun when you first got back out there. It’s a rush with those men crazy over your beautiful, smart, leggy, blond self! You’ve got to kiss a lot of frogs…or buy a lot of electronic devices.

  2. 2 apathetic bliss September 25, 2008 at 9:46 pm

    Everybody needs a good cry sometimes… big hugs to you…just keep putting one foot infront of the other.

  3. 3 apathetic bliss September 25, 2008 at 9:46 pm

    btw I totally loved Free To Be You And Me when I was a kid!

  4. 4 gingermagnolia September 25, 2008 at 10:02 pm

    Honey – Thanks, I needed that smack, and the pep talk.

    AP – Thanks for the hug! I know, me too…I still can recite it when it’s on. My sister and I used to act out the “babies” skit and the “ladies first” skit. We were weird.

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