Thank you everyone for the comments. I’m sorry I can’t answer them all, but I just can’t right now.
I do want you to know that this time, I won’t be telling all. It just doesn’t feel right. I think that he was honest with me, and I respect that, even though it hurts like a motherfuckin’ sumbitch. If his heart wasn’t in it, then it wasn’t, and I don’t want someone to be with me if it’s not. Ya know?
I kept busy all day, my mom, Big J, Beks and her kids went to lunch, then I killed time writing and writing and writing everything that was in my head, talked to a couple of friends, and my sister and her husband took me to see The Hangover. It was pretty damn funny, but of course, my mind kept wandering. I’m afraid to go to sleep because I’m afraid I’ll have bad dreams and I know it’s gonna hurt a lot when I wake up. The little sleep I’ve had so far wasn’t good, and filled with nightmares.
I’m hurting and I’m sad, and it really, really fucking sucks. I’ll get over it. I’ll be stronger. Don’t seem to be getting any smarter, but maybe stronger is enough.
P.S. Please forgive me if I post a lot of “feelings” in the near future.
I just want to be ok, be ok, be ok
I just want to be ok today
I just want to be ok, be ok, be ok
I just want to be ok today
I just want to feel today, feel today, feel today
I just want to feel something today
I just want to feel today, feel today, feel today
I just want to feel something today
CHORUS:
Open me up and you will see
I’m a gallery of broken hearts
I’m beyond repair, let me be
And give me back my broken parts
I just want to know today, know today, know today
I just want to know something today
I just want to know today, know today, know today
Know that maybe I will be ok
CHORUS
Just give me back my pieces
Just give them back to me please
Just give me back my pieces
And let me hold my broken parts
I just want to be ok, be ok, be ok
I just want to be ok today
I just want to be ok, be ok, be ok
I just want to be ok today
I just want to feel today, feel today, feel today
I just want to feel something today
I just want to know today, know today, know today
Know that maybe I will be ok
Know that maybe I will be ok
Know that maybe I will be ok
It’s your blog post whatever pops into your head.
Absolutely. Write what you want to write. Write it out.
Keep on keeping busy. And write it out, just like you said. It’s ok to wallow for a bit
My heart is breaking for you as well. I’m sorry.
Staying busy is the best that you can do, especially if you can’t trash the guy! Hang in there, my friend.
Ginger, You are free to vent on your own page whenever you feel the need, of course! We will be here to listen and support you. Keep your chin up. As much as it sucks, you are right, you do need want him to stick around if his heart isn’t in it.
Thanks, everyone.